dont call me a player baby because i'm in love with you for right now..unh! [entries|friends|calendar] *dani~dear* [ website | wooo Hooo! ] [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

new! [12 Aug 2007|09:32am]

forever means foreverrrrrrrr [10 Jan 2007|12:36am] life is starting to look better now... i finally learned the true meaning of love and friendship and the true meaning of a relationship... as a few of you know i said i was having the WORST day ever... but as a good friend rj said... since this is the worst day ever the days after that have to be better... and it is... last night was life changing... i realized how much in love i was and how lost i would be with out tim... i stopped hiding and told any secret i've ever had... i can FINALLY with out hesitation say i am over matt... i didnt think i could but i finally did it and it feels so good to say it now and know i mean it... i can finally love tim whole heartedly and know that i am not hiding anything... its so funny... a year ago didnt expect us to make it and we did and i'm beyondoverjoyed that it did because with out tim i dont want to know where i'd be... probably a drunk whore still popping pills... neither of which i am any more... i havent gotten drunk since last christmas eve, i havent popped a pill in a few years and i actually threw my bottle of hydro away upon meeting tim and didnt think twice about it... i found GOD and plan on having a personal relationship with Him to fill the void thats missing... *starting to get a bit choked up here*... for the first time in my life i knew that if i walked away i'd be making the biggest mistake of my life and i didnt want that to happen... i wouldnt be able to live with that... i begged and pleaded that if God could save my relationship i'd do the right thing and now i have to live up to my half of the bargin... so it was kinda funny when i heard this song it summed everything up into a few little minutes... i posted the lyrics because they are so true... so yea MMMMMMMMMM Ever since I was a baby girl I had a dream Cinderella theme Crazy as it seems Always knew that deep inside that there would come that day But I would have to wait Make so many mistakes I couldn't comprehend As I watched it unfold This classic story told I left it in the cold Walking through an open door that led me back to you Each one unlocking more of the truth I finally stopped tripping on my youth I finally got lost inside of you I finally know that I needed to grow And finally my mate has met my soul chorus Finally Now my destiny can begin Though it will have a different set Something strange and new is happening Finally Now my life doesn't seem so bad It's the best that I've ever had Give my love to him finally MMMMMMMM I remember the beginning you already knew I acted like a fool Just trying to be cool Fronting like it didn't matter I just ran away And on another phase Was lost in my own space Found what its like to hurt selfishly Scared to give of me Afraid to just believe I was in a jealous, insecure, pathetic place Stumbled through the mess that I have made Finally got out of my own way I've Finally started living for today I finally know that I needed to grow And finally my mate has met my soul [chorus Finally Now my destiny can begin Though we will have a different set Something strange and new is happening Finally Now my life doesn't seem so bad It's the best that I've ever had Gave my love to him Finally MMMMMMMM Finally, Finally ;Finally Now my destiny can begin Though it will have a different set Something beautiful is happening, happening Finally Now my life doesn't seem so bad It's the best that I've ever had Give my love to him Ohhhhhhh, Finally, Finally, finally

its all just a shame.... [07 Jan 2007|10:47am] [ mood | heart broken... ] [ music | rubber band banks- young dro ] its over... i know it... all because he asked what i was tired of and FOR ONCE i  was honest... great start to a horrible day...

ha comedy [30 Dec 2006|07:29pm] [ mood | so damn vindicated! ] [ music | scared of you- nelly furtado ] ha so i was hangin out at the town center on lunch one day... for once i actually stayed up there... and i saw my ex mike and his girlfriend... dude... SHE HAS A MUSTACHE! she is 19... she has the worst ever skinny body on earth and you know what... w/ every girlfriend he gets i know that i was the best, most healthy looking girlfriend ever! his sister even told me so when she came in town so HA!

holy moly... [28 Dec 2006|10:33pm] [ mood | bored... ] i'm pregnant.... jk....

[10 Dec 2005|02:20am]  me and heather me and  jeanie  everyone... well some of everyone   all these damn pictures are years too damn late... sorry guys... i had to have time to do something ya know productive with my time rather than goin to sleep... work is EXHAUSTING and i'm suprised i'm not dead ass tired yet

updates updates... [07 Dec 2005|02:25am] [ mood | happy ] well i will be an auntie to a silly baby boy in march i'm ready to settle down with matt work is great i get along with EVERYONE my knee is coming along fine and school is amazing

circles and triangles and now we're hangin out with your new girlfriend [01 Nov 2005|12:21pm] [ mood | lovable, but that could change ] last nite... i talked to shante, mike's new girlfriend. and she's really not that bad of a girl... infact, we're pretty similar believe it or not. there was no animosity between us... we talked on the phone from like 130ish to about 3 in the damn morning haha. but she's pretty cool. We both have the same opinions on everything and all so its all good. anyway... i think its funny... we didnt talk any trash to eachother, seeing as i am the ex girlfriend and she is the current. we talked openly about our relationships with him and how they are kinda the same, but different. but thats with anyone... so all in all i gained a new friend and i'm cool with the fact that shes with him, besides i have matt, where can i go wrong with him?! so anyway while we are on the subject of yesterday, work was AMAAZING! i am so glad that everything went smoothly and nothing bad happened. its like last year, everything that could have happened, did... this year it was perfect! and i get to think about stuff for kids fest lmao yesssss! more stress, but i'm lovin it!

hmmmm aint that somethin mr CHOKES ON NUTS... i thought you were happy? [21 Oct 2005|02:31pm] [ mood | just a jumble of feelings ] [ music | queen ] today has went from cool and calm to annoyed and confused... i got an email from mr shitthead and it was like what the hell.. apparently he doesnt seem to get it... he is with bonesheeka who he really likes so leave me the hell alone ya know... i dont get him at all and i dont even wanna try. how can you send me an email sayin hey baby girl?! i'm not your fuckin baby girl lets get that shit straight right fuckin now. its like okay... i dont understand why i'm so mad at this... well i kinda do but then again i dont and i dont wanna think about it. i was over all the shit that happened and here he comes just addin more gasoline to the fire. fuck him. i hope he chokes on a dick or something. you know what... why the hell do i fuckin deal with this shit. if i didnt mean that much to you in the first place why the hell dwell on the fuckin issue! let it go! lmao but i'm just upset at the fact that i have to deal with his ass once again... oh well... atleast i dont have to worry about runnin into his ass on the street

guilt... [08 Oct 2005|09:04pm] [ mood | guilty ] i feel really bad right now... apparently will (the 26yr old), got shot... well let me just let you read the convo between me and his sister.... her: hey you know my brother brownbombshelle: hey whuddup her: well he was shot the other day brownbombshelle: are you serious her: yeah i know who you are cause he have your screenname and a name on paper he wanted me to let you know brownbombshelle: is he okay her: yeah just got shot by his ex brownbombshelle: thats fucked up her: yeah he told her he didnt want her and that he had someone which i'm for sure is you right and she nutted up and shot him her: his phone saved him brownbombshelle: wow... brownbombshelle: thas crazy her: yeah her: but you are his woman right brownbombshelle: i think brownbombshelle: not too sure her: what you mean he got shot over you and you dont know if youare his woman or not brownbombshelle: we never talk her: man my brother is crazy about you cause you the one in jville he is tryin to go and see brownbombshelle: i know thats its just a lot of things that are goin on in my head right now and i told him about it her: well he loves you yur name is dani right brownbombshelle: yeah her: for real brownbombshelle: yeah i'm dani her: i dont know what you and him talk about or what you have done or affect you have on him but he is crazy about you brownbombshelle: really? her: woman to woman i think he is whipped lol dont tell him i said that and he havent even got any from you brownbombshelle: hahaha thats sweet her: but you have his number right brownbombshelle: ummm let me get my phone and see brownbombshelle: brb brownbombshelle: is it 407-***-****? her: yeah just call him and tell him how much you miss him love him and care about him ok he would appreciate that and our family will also ok brownbombshelle: okay... but one thing her: what that brownbombshelle: i miss him... i just dont love him... but i really do care for him her: ok that is you i'm jsut sayin something ok brownbombshelle: yeah i know that brownbombshelle: i can do that though her: aight thank you very much her: talk to you soon or later crazyness idk if i believe it, but i'm a lil afraid... HOOOOO-LEEE SHIT

my letter to you know who [06 Oct 2005|02:46pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | old school ] Dear Fucker Who Will Remain Unnamed, i hope your balls fall into a pile of elephant shit. i hate how you thought you played me... the game is on you bitch. youre so arrogant you cant seem to see that everyone hates you. even her... fuck you.... fall in a kiddie pool of shit and drown... <3 dani *yall know who this goes to* and its NOT matt! i <3 him! ANYWAY my days are gettin better... i'm gettin emails from my baby!, i go back to work soon, i can almost dance like i used to... this is great... well except that one thing... what a loser. anyway... i went to therapy yesterday. had a blast! we were just talkin about the weather like lil old people and i didnt even know that we were goin through a damn tropical storm (sees how much i pay attention to the news).... oh well... so yeah i did the good thing and drove home in the horrible weather and didnt get scared once! i didnt hydroplane or nothin so yaaaaaay! i'm not so scared to drive in the rain anymore! lmao... but anyway so yeah therapy was fun. i came home ate lots of macaroni and cheese and grape soday hopin to gain some kinda weight back and slept like a bum... yeah i'm almost skinny... apparently CARBS DONT MAKE YOU GAIN WEIGHT! so the carb free diet is just a buncha b/s (*aka heather talk*) okay anyway so yeah... that person i cant stand (*the guy anyway*) called me to hang out one day and i say sure... but there is gonna be some funny shit goin down and my lovely sandwhich is gonna help me out there.... i cant wait! anyway... last nite daniel, jason,and jeanie came over and hung out. I GOT BEADS FOR SHOWIN A TANK TOP APPARENTLY... lmao poor jasons neons did somethin to a wire and grounded out somethin or another on his car... no offense sandwhich, i'm car illiterate... lmao well only on certain parts.... so anyway he had to get jumped by jeanie! oh yeah sorry if we pissed you off jeanie... i <3 you! and yes i does anyway so yeah ummm what else is there to talk about... oh my class is so fuckin lame... this one group of people... i cant stand them! they just sit and talk all day long and this fucker russel... i'll beat his ass... lmao... but i like the people i sit with... they are the shit lol oh well yall thats it...

wow i feel like crap now [04 Oct 2005|10:34pm] all i have to say yall is fuck mike forget he even existed

government watches panda porn... [04 Oct 2005|07:40pm] [ mood | chizillin ] [ music | run- snow patrol ] i'm lame... i'll update just a lil bit.... 1. things between me and tiebe are better, we're okay now that we dont live in the same house 2. i saw a shooting star the other day and forgot to wish (*dammit daniel and jason*) 3. got an email from my baby! i <3 him so much i hope to see him on my spring break in JAPAN BITCHES! god i miss him! 4. dad broke my car but fixed it 5. i think thats it.... bye

beautiful lawns... [02 Oct 2005|09:18pm] [ mood | chilllin wit a bottle of sobe ] [ music | desperate housewives ] i have to get used to the fact that will died. yesterday i drove past his house and his brother was outside washin the car that belonged to will and i swore it was will... but it was ryan... it was so weird seeing ryan wash the cars ya know. that was wills job!!!! :( oh well... it'll take some extreme gettin used to... but i'll deal.... anyway... i began to think last nite before i fell asleep... i was thinkin about my baby (as i always do before i go to sleep) and i cant wait to live together. as strange as this sounds i cant wait to be miserable living in the same house together. lol. we already have our puppies name and breed picked out. haha we want a mutt lmao named scrufus (screw-fus) cuz i wanted rufus and he wanted scruffy lmao we are nerds i know but i love him. we were talkin about marriage and he pointed out something. i am gonna go from one screwed up last name to another. from corker to belcher damn... lmao but yeah i cant wait to just be able to lay on the couch and watch countless episodes of world war two movies knowing damn well i could care less about the damn war... god he is such a nerd. i love this boy so much that i am willing to deal with the simpsons all day! lol hahaha damn thas love. haha but yeah. i decided to not get a tattoo until he comes back. i want him to see me get my first tattoo and/or body piercing... even though he got his nippies pierced with out me... i'll let him slide... november will be 4 years!!!!! yay! longest yet. i cant wait to see him again. i'll probably freak the hell out and rape him in the hallway lmao jk i'll just smother him with kisses and hugs! but that wont be for a while... damn i miss him :(... oh well... bye

my heart is put back together again yay!!! [29 Sep 2005|01:50am] [ mood | i love him ] to matt from dani "are we over??? we dont talk... you dont reply back to my emails... this sucks... i love you i really do... and you know that.... but we just have nothing... to be honest it feels like i'm single now... cuz i dont talk to you at all... so can you please explain to me whats goin on here... i dont want to lose you because i love you too much to let go and try to start over." to dani from matt "hey baby girl, we are not over and never will be. things have been getting pretty crazy around here. i ve tried to email you from my phone but it comes up that it can't reach you. our computers have been down for the past 2 weeks and we got back from underway 3 weeks ago. i will try my best to call you this weekend. i have duty today so ill try to call you tommarrow. don't ever ask me again are we over cause you know that can't happen. remember that i love you and that i always will. i ll check later to see if you emailed me back. i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO" i wanted to end it so bad but just within reading this i'm happy again... i love this boy so much yall that it even scares me... he's talkin marriage in the future and i'm excited. i cant wait till we talk... its gonna be great 2 |

a sonnet of love... [21 Sep 2005|01:51am] [ mood | I'M FREEEE! ] FUCK YOU MATT ITS OVER BITCH! 2 |

missing people sucks... [08 Sep 2005|11:37pm] [ mood | sad ] [ music | destiny's child- destiny fullfilled ] all day today i thought about matt....i couldnt get him out of my head... i fuckin miss that boy. there was just so much fuckin love everywhere... my parents anniversary was today (22 years) and they were so happy and then we got on the subject of boyfriends/girlfriends and i was like yeah... my boyfriend's overseas... we havent seen eachother since graduation in 2004... it sucks ya know. its like i'm upset that he went into the navy... but i'm also glad because we probably wouldnt have gotten back together. but it sucks because i cant call him like i used to. back in school it was if i needed him, he was a phone call away.... and now i cant really hear his voice like i used to and i miss it... i cant stand being away from him like this... its hard... and since i cant see him for christmas sucks so much because i was expecting to see him and i had such high hopes and he ain coming and it sucks.... what really sucks is i got what i wanted.... but i cant have it at the same time.... i got my first love... i got the one i basically went through high school for and at the same time i'm lonely... i hate that.... i sat up till like three thinkin of him and cryin because he'll be overseas for a couple more years.... i miss him... i miss everything we did together.... like prom... prom was my best memory of us... we danced and i felt for once, loved. not like by my friends or something... but loved like a boyfriend/girlfriend type thing...i wish i hadnt waited so long to tell him i loved him... i was scared that he may reject me and lookie loo.... man oh man am i rambling or what....

i take it he dont come on fridays.... [26 Aug 2005|10:04pm] [ mood | content ] [ music | gangsters and thugs- the transplants ] todays therapy was okay i guess.... it was like okay i'm here bend me shape me do whatever the hell you wanna do with me... i dont care! Mr Sexy Arms and Legs wasnt there to keep me motivated. But they were busy as HELL! I got in there and it was like... hmmm.... okay... where do i go to stretch out and stuff... well i got sent to NO MANS LAND as it seems... it was so lonely over there man. but after gettin to 110 degrees (*after what seemed like an hour or so*) i got to ride the excercise bike... *painfully* got to ride the bike EMPHASIS ON PAINFULLY... let me tell ya... i couldnt make a full go 'round until like three minutes left and i was in tears almost... maybe i should remember to take a percocet before i go... but i was driving so i couldnt be under the influence of anything. It's already bad enough that i keep it in my backpack so if a cop would to pull me over i'd be fucked! lmao... but yeah... so that was my LAME ASS DAY at therapy.... big woopieee....

my reply [19 Aug 2005|09:22pm] 1. Go here. 2. Pass it on. ( my answers ) 2 |

[17 Aug 2005|04:39pm] [ mood | pissed off ] [ music | kelly osbourne- one word ] those of you who i actually chose can read what i posted on myspace b/c i dont think the things i say can be trusted on here.... those of you who have myspaces know how to read it and if you cant read it let me know and i'll add ya on there... thank you! ♥, Dani

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